Sunday, August 17, 2008

I hate "pwincesses"!!

I was feeling crafty this past week and since Hannah likes playing princess so much, I decided to make her a princess skirt...true to her form, she declared "I hate pwincesses" and refuses to wear this creation I worked so hard to make. Not really...actually it wasn't that hard or expensive, but STILL! She wore it for all of about 30 seconds while I tried to take her picture. In this picture, she is trying to untie it and was telling me it was "bad."

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Fart Putty--the ultimate humiliation.

Everyone who knows us well knows that we are not ones to embarass easily, but get this one...

I go to Wesco yesterday to get a newspaper. The kids, as usual, are with me and go in with me. We get about 2 feet into Wesco and I hear......(how do you spell the sound that a nasty fart makes???).....anyways, I hear a fart, turn around, and it's my lovely son who has brought in what we call "Fart Putty," which is like putty that goes in a jar and you push it in and it makes very lovely nasty sounds. Great stuff.

Anyways, so that happens. He starts laughing and points at me and says (in his loud voice) MOM FARTED! And continues to make the sounds, walking behind me right behind my butt, proclaiming to everyone in earshot that "my mom is farting." All the while, little sister is following right along chanting "mommy farted" and singing "skunk in the barnyard..."

Even though I KNOW I'm not farting and it's obvious those sounds are "fake" I start turning red when just about every male in the store starts laughing and saying "right on" to Haiden. This only fuels him more, and he tells these guys that mom farts all the time and can't eat spaghetti because it makes her fart even more (okay...we won't get into that one. Let's just say I stay away from pasta). I'm turning really red by that point and sweating like crazy even though it's like 60 degrees in that place.

I pay for my paper after waiting in line a hellish 2 or 3 minutes, and practically run out of the place with kids at my heels (or rather, behind my hind end, still making sound effects and Hannah chanting "pee-you mommy") and all the customers and staff laughing at us.

Later in the day (we're still on the same day here), Haiden brings the same fart putty to my doctor appointment and hides behind the exam table making fart sounds the entire time we were in there. He tells the doctor that I need a shot because I pooped my pants, and Hannah agrees, saying "mommy has a stinky diaper."

This is what I deal with on a daily basis with these kids...anyone want to borrow them????

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Lovin' the hair, mom!

Got my hair cut yesterday and had the privilege of having the kids with me...
Haiden pronounced my hair cut "stupid" and told me I looked like a "stupid loser." Thanks.

Yay moment: Hannah has been wearing underwear almost all day now with no slip ups, even out in public! : ) I have not had to buy a pack of diapers in over a month. Woo hoo!

Boo moment: See above mentioned comment about my stupid hair cut.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Haiden turns the big 5!

Haiden just had his 5th birthday last Monday and we celebrated on Saturday with a party. It was so funny...him waking up on Monday morning, asking me to measure him because "I don't FEEL taller and I don't look older!" He actually asked me to spike his hair so he would look older and put on a stick-on tattoo "because older boys have tattoos."

Monday, Jeremy came home from work at noon and took Haiden out fishing and to the beach "just the boys." Fine with me because I am scared to death of fish and until I lose about 50 pounds there is no way in heck you are getting me out on the beach in a swimsuit. So...they went out, I stayed home with Hannah. Boy, is she different when big brother is gone! We played ponies, her new favorite "game," went swimming in the pool out back, took a walk in the woods...all without one bit of screaming because big brother was not there to fight with!

Anyways, Monday was Haiden's day. I made cupcakes for him, which was a big deal for him since I don't make cupcakes very often. I didn't even make them out of bran or anything...although I did think about making bran muffins and putting frosting on them...but I restrained myself.

Friday, Haiden had his 5-year checkup, where upon being asked if he knew any good nursery rhymes or kids' songs, he proclaimed to the nursing staff and doctor that Linkin Park, Sublime, Nickelback, and Foo Fighters were his fave bands, and went into renditions of "The Pretender" complete with air guitar riffs and screaming "WHAT IF I SAY I'M NOT LIKE THE OTHERS...."

Saturday we did the big party, which actually turned out quite small because most everyone was out of town on vacation. Again, fine with me, since that meant less mess, less money spent, less stress. It worked out pretty well and they had fun. If I can ever figure out how to put pics on here, I will do that. He had his friend Evie over and cousin Summer, both of whom are 5 years old, and Evie's little brother Jacob and, of course, little sister Hannah. My friend Nanci showed up, which was so nice of her seeing as her husband and son (also one of Haiden's friends) could not make it, but she decided to come anyway (thanks Nanci!). Also there were my parents, friend Rose, sister Jessie and her fiance Ryan, mother-in-law Pat, sister-in-law Tracy, great-grandma and grandpa McLean (my grandparents), and great-grandma Westfield. Not a huge party, but I really am glad we scaled it down and kept it simple this year.

So...Haiden's 5 now. I know this sounds really cliche, but I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday! He thinks it's so funny hearing about the day he was born (or how babies are born in general). I can't believe he was so small his head fit in our hands and he barely reached our elbows (he was 5 pounds and 19 inches, so he was pretty tiny!). I tell him that when he was born, he weighed the same as a bag of sugar and he laughs hysterically.

Happy Birthday Haiden!

Oh, that's what a blog is for??

So...I was having trouble figuring out what this whole blog thing was supposed to be about, but just realized doesn't have to be about anything! I am always being accused of not telling friends/family enough about what is going on and have not been the best at keeping in touch with everyone I should be keeping in touch with, but I AM on the computer a lot seeing as I work from home, and I am a pretty damn good typer, so here it is. For all of you who accuse me of not keeping in touch, not giving you the low down on my life and what is going on, this blog is dedicated to you. Warning: Do not come complaining to me that you now know more than you ever wanted to know! Just kidding.